If he were governor …

Published 5:51 pm Tuesday, December 15, 2020

Editor, The Smithfield Times:

If I was governor, if possible and feasible, I’d like to:

  1. Harden all power, information and transportation systems against electromagnetic pulse.
  2. Form homeless camps, which would consist of teardrop trailers, one for each homeless person, who would sweep sidewalks, pick up trash, etc., and in return would get a place to stay and three squares a day.
  3. Arm all government schoolteachers.
  4. Train anyone who wants to in marksmanship and safe gun handling and storage.
  5. Eliminate taxes on property.
  6. Allow the government to control private property only if it creates a hazard, stops other people from using their property or is a nuisance. Appearance would not count as a nuisance.
  7. Pardon anyone involved in a pre-third-trimester abortion.
  8. With the exception of revenge porn, pardon anyone charged or convicted of a non-violent drug, sex or gun “offense.”
  9. Phase out government schools, or at least give people who don’t use them a tax refund.
  10. Make all Virginia funerals green (see Discover Magazine, September/October 2020, page 30, “Life after death”)
  11. Regarding the virus, I’d let individual people, stores and industries decide for themselves what precautions to take.
  12. Pardon anyone charged with a religious or any other victimless crime.
  13. Make any word that has a “Z” sound in it be spelled with a “w” instead of an “x.”

Can I count on your vote?

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Jim P. McAdaragh