Letter – How to tell a man ‘no’

Published 4:27 pm Tuesday, January 9, 2024

Editor, The Smithfield Times:

After having read about Wayne Hall being arrested for “groping a woman he knew (in her house), I have a few remarks. 

I am now 80 years old, but in my day, I was pretty “tough,” as one military man said, meaning attractive. I received plenty of unwanted attention. I never had anyone arrested or got them into trouble. I handled the situation myself. 

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Here are some things one can say: 1) NO, back off. 2) NO, I’m not interested, 3) NO, leave me alone. 4) NO, leave my house now. 5) Do not touch me 6) Move away from me. 7) I value our friendship, but I’m not interested in you romantically. If all else fails, if necessary, kick them where it hurts. 

I feel a woman should always be prepared to handle unwanted sexual aggression. If all of these things fail to make the person leave you alone, then contact the police. Arresting someone should be a last resort. 

Several years ago, a younger man said he would like to spend some time with me. I thanked him for thinking I was attractive and told him I was happily married. He said, “Wouldn’t you say you were going out with the girls one night?” I said, “Absolutely not. I love my husband.” That was the end of the conversation. He didn’t get mad and I didn’t get offended. In fact, I smiled inside after the incident as it was nice to know I was seen as attractive. 

Life is certainly interesting, but as a God-fearing woman, I aim to stay on the straight and narrow path toward heaven. Life is so much better when we live under God’s love and protection.

 

Patricia Kessler

Smithfield